Reader’s Letter: Role models

POSTED: 01/29/13 1:00 PM

O.K., Russell Simmons writes a lot of nonsense about abortion, euthanasia and homosexuality, but lately I liked his article about the importance of role models. Indeed, it is very important for everybody to have a role model. Let me tell the reader how I found mine. It was in La Bamba on a Tuesday night. His name is Robert. Everybody in Simpson Bay knows him. He rides on his bike in Simpson Bay. He greets you, not by ringing his bell, but by sounding a horn he has constructed on his steering wheel. Every year he takes part in the Carnival parade, not with a group but as an individual. Yes, he is an amiable, crazy guy. A while ago, at La Bamba, I offered him a cigarette. He did not take my cigarette, because he had decided to stop smoking. When he said that, I admired him and I hated myself. I had been smoking for 50 years. I knew that was stupid, but I never stopped. So I thought: “If Robert can do it, I can do it too.” For two years I do not smoke any more. A bit later, at Buccaneer Bar, I offered him a beer. “Sorry Gerard, give me an orange juice, I do not drink any more”.  Unbelievable! So, for a while I do not drink and smoke any more, thanks to my role model Robert. Apart from that he is a great storey teller.

He once told me a story, so funny, that I laughed as I have never laughed in my whole life. He worked as a security officer in New York. One night he met with a huge, overweight lady who fell in love with him. She desperately wanted to go to bed with him. After a while, Robert thought “Why not?” and they went to a cheap hotel. They climbed the stairs, the lady in front of Robert. Half way one of the steps broke under the huge weight of the lady. She barely could hold on to the banister. Anyway, they reach their room, undress and go to bed. Robert describes in detail what happens in the bed.  I will not go into details. I just say, that, by intense, wild lovemaking one leg of the bed after the other broke and that they ended up on the floor. The receptionist must have heard the noise and came to the room. Robert had to pay for the bed, but he could escape because as a security officer he had a gun.

Yes, Robert is my role model, but deep down I realize I will never equal him. I may be able to stop smoking and drinking, but I doubt if I, at my age, will ever be able to make love to an overweight lady in such a wild way that the legs of the bed will break.

Gerard Bijnsdorp,

Learning from “crazy” people.

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