Opinion: Proven failure

POSTED: 02/12/13 12:13 PM

Living happily forever after is not given to every married couple. On the contrary, statistics suggest that marriage is nothing more than a proven failure.

If we look at the crude divorce rate versus the crude marriage rate in the twelve countries we will specify in this article, we have to conclude that everlasting love is going out of fashion.

Crude divorce and marriage ratios are the number of divorces and marriages per 100,000 inhabitants. This makes it possible to compare the numbers per country irrelevant of their population. The percentage we refer to here is the number of divorces in a given year as a percentage of the number of marriages in the same year.

While there is a lot to say about these numbers, it is hard to argue that the concept of marriage is a success. It looks more like a proven failure that may make one wonder why people still bother.

The absolute lowest ratio we found is in Chile with 3 percent. The highest is in Belgium with 71 percent.

In the region we see that the Bahamas (5) and Jamaica (9) are doing relatively well. But on other places the numbers quickly shoot up to worrisome levels: St. Vincent and the Grenadines (14), St. Lucia (250, Suriname (31), Trinidad and Tobago (35), Dominican Republic (41).

The Netherlands is not much better with 43 percent; the United States scores 53 percent and France 55. Unfortunately, we do not have a number for St. Maarten.

What do these numbers mean? Looking at the United States they mean that 53 percent of marriages end in a divorce.

We read somewhere a piece by Paul Kokoski in which he claims that homosexuality “has already led to the destruction of the family unit.” Furthermore, he links homosexuality to pedophilia by quoting the American psychiatrist Fitzgibbon who has a vast experience with treating priests with pedophilia. We figure that this man must have a busy practice indeed. Here is his statement: “Every priest whom I treated who was involved with children sexually had previously been involved in adult homosexual relationships.”

Kokoski concludes that homosexuality is linked to pedophilia. We conclude that pedophilia is linked to priesthood.

But why a gay life style would lead to the destruction of the family unit remains a mystery. Kokoski does not argue that everyone who gets divorced throws him or herself into a gay lifestyle. There are no data available to support that position.

The concept of live-and-let-live has passed Kokoski by. While he claims that the gay community is forcing its lifestyle upon the rest of the world, he does exactly the same with biblical references that may very well be true and valuable for him but there is no evidence that everyone – even within religious communities – agrees with this point of view.

It is okay to oppose a gay lifestyle or a lesbian lifestyle. Nobody is asking anyone to agree with it – the same way nobody is asking anyone to agree with a heterosexual lifestyle. If you are against the gay and lesbian lifestyle just follow this advice: do not – we repeat: do not – marry somebody of the same sex and stop pushing your agenda on others.

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